The Pits of Fake it Until You Make It
HOST
All right, so every man inevitably has this existential realization where you work your way, you work yourself into a perfect moment. And in that moment, on paper, everything is supposed to feel sublime, right? The, the, the ambience, the tempo, everything's clicked and you're in this moment. And maybe you're with a beautiful woman, maybe it's just a perfect song is on wherever you are.
You. Everything gets thrown into perspective. Like your whole life kind of flashes before your eyes and you have this self awareness that you're supposed to be completely thrown into the moment without any sort of insecurity or self awareness or anything kind of prodding at you that would take you out of that moment. But you, but you can't do that.
What you do is you panic and you, and you go into a state of worry of why the. Does this perfect scenario not feel calibrated to what it's supposed to feel like? Why am I in this perfect environment? And why do I find myself having to talk myself up and gas myself up into finding happiness or contentment or fulfillment?
The moment itself is not providing it for you. And so then you become a spectator. And now you're zoomed out of the moment and you're critiquing your performance, right? You're just sitting there and you're critiquing yourself rather than throwing all that to the wayside and being able to just enjoy the rapture.
And where this spawns from is faking it until you make it. Because if you catapult yourself to success and you do it in a way that's even remotely inauthentic, you. There's no differentiation between reality and faking it. Now.
You just can't stop faking it. So you don't even know what you're supposed to feel when you're in these, when you're in these environments. And so now you begin to loathe and just hate the performance itself. And this is a very, very common experience.
Every man will find themselves in this moment. And how you deal with this moment is very glaring. And it's a very harrowing portrait of just the overall landscape of your life. So it's extremely crucial to consider the kind of work that you're doing to get to where you are.
The quality of work that you put in to reach your success is going to dictate everything in those moments. And if you're a guy who relied on life hacks, workarounds, shortcuts, patchwork to get to success, you're not going to be able to enjoy the moment you're not truly ever going to be able to enjoy it. And then you have to weigh the cost. Is it worth the conquest of just mowing everything down in your path and finding results at the expense of not being able to enjoy it when you get what you think, what you want?
Or would you rather be the kind of guy who is able to just be fucking comfortable in his own skin, regardless of the results? And that's the more virtuous path, right? I talk about the naked man like the, the guy who has nothing, no instruments, no props, no stage gimmickry. If that guy can find comfort in his environment in absentia of the success when he does get it, it's just the cherry on top and it's by proxy.
So if you are not enough without it, you're never gonna feel enough when you have it. That's just a fact. And we can, we can break that down in, in myriad ways. There's, there's thousands of examples of people who have achieved very lofty, colossal forms of success.
But the paradox is they're never really able to kind of capture the magic of those moments and they resent it. And, and this is what this copy paste culture breeds. This whole idea of you sitting behind your computer and trying to copy the mechanisms and techniques that other people are using to succeed. You can do that all day, right?
You can ape into crypto trades, you can sit there with the best data on the planet that somebody else fed you, and you can make millions of dollars doing that. But there's always an element of existential despair that comes with that. That's why none of these guys, during this last bull run who made these huge fortunes, none of them are happy, none of them know how to deal with the success. Because again, when you disobey the laws of nature, nature will punish you.
And every man has to craft and mold himself from the primordial ooze. And that's a self discovery adventure. You can't just piggyback and, and, and coast under somebody else's wings to success and think that you're going to be able to deal with the consequences of that. And so again, the materialism itself is obviously important.
You have to win resources, you have to be gritty, you have to find clever ways to kind of, I want to say, nestle yourself into alcoves of success. But if you are not the kind of person who is content without it, when you get it, you're really gonna yourself because you're, like I said, you're always going to be that critic, you're always going to be zoomed out, analyzing yourself, that from that omniscient point of view, you have no sense of self. So you can never kind of bask in the glory of anything that you've achieved. And you're, and you're running on almost a low level form of self loathing.
It's almost like a self hatred because you're like, now I know I gotta perform again. I'm in a tavern with mahogany tables. The chairs are beautiful, it's dimly lit. You might have a perfect 10 draped over you.
You got rose on the table. But a lot of people don't understand that when you have a lot of money. I think the biggest disappointment for a lot of people when they, when they do stumble upon success is that the food doesn't taste any better, the music doesn't sound any better, the sex doesn't feel any better. It's all the same.
And I think people, part of the fantasy and part of the high is people. People fantasize about being in that perfect moment once they've struck it big. Everybody wants to strike it big so they can envision themselves in that perfect setting where the spotlight's on them. There's tons of people at the dinner table, everyone's talking about their success.
The elements of the story are perfect, but inside you have this. You're tormented because you can't understand why you just don't fucking feel calibrated to what the moment's supposed to be offering you. And that's what that copy paste culture does is, it's, it's very much a blood, sweat and tears investment game, right? Like, like the story that made you who you are is way more important than the outcome.
The tussle, the struggle, the game of tug of war, the backlash, the denouement, the climax. Like all those story plots and elements have to be present in order for you to truly enjoy the benefits of whatever prosperity you've been given. And so if you find yourself in a constant position of being in environments where you have to talk yourself in, you almost have to coach yourself just to feel some semblance of happiness or joy because it's not natural, then you have a massive amount of work to do. And this is, I mean, this is, this is a classic archetype.
This is why people who win the lottery piss it away. It's why people who rely on game and trickery and deception to get women, it's why they end up destroying those relationships. Because if you earn anything, you The. The unconscious mind is undefeated.
It's undefeated. If you earn anything that subconsciously you know you don't deserve, you're gonna give it back, and you're gonna give it back in spades. That's why it's so dangerous, because you're not just gonna give it. You're not just gonna give the one thing back.
The ratio. The magnitude of that ratio is going to exponentially increase. You're going to give back interest. You're going to pay back far more than what it was that you earned, and you're going to continue to donate it until you can feel that authenticity.
And there's. There's millions of examples of this. So let's. Let's use that as the springboard.
I'm going to take some questions. I want to hear some of you guys experiences with sort of this. This dreadful feeling of having everything you think you want, but you're still miserable. Sun hound, what's up?
All right, if you guys aren't firing questions right away, I'm just going to keep it moving. D. What's up?
CALLER 6
Yo, Brute, what's going on, brother?
HOST
What's up, brother? Talk to us.
CALLER 6
Hey, man, first off, thanks for allowing me to come on here and talk, man, but I. But I. But I want to kind of touch on what you said about the whole being. Myself, being in situation.
Money in my. It just didn't feel like I earned it, man. It just felt like, you know, I kind of like. Like you said about the whole hitting the lottery thing, man.
It's like I don't. I didn't really. I didn't put no work in to earn this, man. You know, I'm.
I'm in the moment and I'm. I'm there, but it's not something that I really earned. I'm just kind of. You kind of feel lucky, man?
HOST
Yeah, you feel lucky. And I mean, the.
CALLER 6
The.
HOST
It's just. It's a completely inverted mindset. I mean, you should be trying to build the lottery, right? Like you.
CALLER 6
The whole.
HOST
The whole mindset is that I. I'm gonna build the lottery. I don't need to hit jack. I don't need to get lucky.
I'm gonna build myself into the type of tyrant that's just. That's just gonna be unstoppable, and I'm gonna just make whatever. Whatever. I'm gonna make do with whatever resources I have in front of me, and I'm gonna maximize that.
That's the. That's the mentality that you have to have Right, right.
CALLER 6
It's, it's, it's as if you're skipping the progress, although you got what it is that you think you found. It's the process, man, that I feel like I'm, I'm kind of skipping out on, you know? But that's it, man. That's, that's.
Yeah, it's the process though, bro. That's, that's, that's like. Because I felt like I didn't been in several situations, man. I'm like hot chick after high chick.
I just it up, you know, I, and you know, she might even be. She might give me a second chance, she might even give me a third chance. But it's like I. Ultimately, you just, you, you just kind of feel.
HOST
Yeah, man, you see it all the time. I mean, you just see, you see, you see prolific examples of people just. Yeah, brother. Yeah.
So look, there's a new age concept that I'm fully on board with, and that's that anything that you are meant to have will never flee from you. Because that's how, that's how powerful the unconscious mind is. And, and I'll go further with this. I believe anything you see in your life that feels supernatural or feels metaphysical is stemming and spurring from the unconscious mind.
Your unconscious mind is the universe. So when you think that you have bad karma, bad luck, woe is me. The universe is conspiring against me. Guess what?
That's the universe. That's the, that's your subconscious conspiring against yourself. And the unconscious mind is so powerful and so deeply layered that it feels supernatural because you feel like you're out of control and you don't have a grip on this. So anything that you're pissing away, money, relationships, anything like that, that's your biggest tell that you're not living authentically and that you're, you're somehow hacking and gaming the system.
And, and that's not what you want to do. Those techniques, those techniques can be overlaid Once you figured out what your, what your path is like, once you get to a place of expertise, then you can start playing in those, in those margins. But until you've got there, you're making a massive mistake using all those little tactics because you're just going to be clueless as to how to maintain it when you do get the results. Thanks, brother.
CALLER 6
Thank you, brother.
HOST
Use. What's up, man?
CALLER 9
Rude. How's it going, man? I wanted to ask you a question because I think sometimes there can be a lot of confusion with the limitations of Language. So when we hear the statement faking it till you make it, how would you define the it?
Is it faking the mannerisms, the style, the physical things like the colors and the clothes? How would you define the it in faking it till you make it?
HOST
I define faking it as you make it as you being a critic of your own performance. So essentially living life from that third person point of view where every conversation that you're engaged in, you are judging yourself from the outside through the eyes of other people, so that you can never fully engage or embrace the moment. You are constantly monitoring, microanalyzing every little behavior, every little mannerism from the outside and not within.
CALLER 9
Makes sense. That was pretty much it. Just getting clarification on that. But everything you're saying, I think is spot on.
I've been in that situation as well where as the saying goes, easy come, easy go, you get it easily. But once you're in that position, it's almost like you can't handle the G forces and it's slowly.
CALLER 6
Oh, my God. That's facts, bro.
HOST
Yeah, you can't handle the G forces. So I always say that you fall back to your baseline identity, right? And so a guy will be in that extravagant moment, but really deep down, he would do anything to extricate himself from that position. And he just wants to be home wearing potato rags, puffing a cigarette by himself on the couch.
Like that's where he really. That's where he really feels he deserves to be. But, but, but the, but the show must go on. So these guys, these fake it till you make it guys, they get so addicted to the performance that they just have to, at any cost, even to themselves, they have to continue the performance.
They have to keep showing up to perform to, because the only validation they're getting is from critiquing the performance itself. There's. There's zero sense of self there. It's all fucking this artificial, manufactured, contrived, constant critique of yourself as if you were God, essentially.
Essentially, you're basically looking at God and judging yourself continuously through the. Through that lens, which obviously creates a tremendous amount of destruction. Thank you,
CALLER 6
My man.
HOST
What's up, brother? I just wanted to ask you. Do you ever feel like you missed out on that journey from your gambling when you won a lot of money?
CALLER 2
Did you ever feel like you missed
HOST
out, Missed out on who missed out on just the opportunity to. To have that hard journey towards the money? Or was it. Was the journey done in a different way?
Brother, the gambling journey is one of the most arduous, temeritous journeys on the planet, brother. In, in 2017, I lost $17 million before I was on Twitter. I lost 17 million in six months. And I never looked back over my shoulder.
And I rebuilt everything from the ground up and, and made a vow to myself that I would put systems in place to mitigate that downside to where I would have a steady flow the rest of my life. So no, man, there's. There's nothing comes easy, brother. Yeah, right.
Thanks. Yeah, it. Matt, what's up, brother? One of my questions is around.
CALLER 2
You're talking about when you have whatever success or some sort of value, like the side of it I see, I don't know, it's different wording, but it's the same sort of thing is if you, if you got there with, I guess like fakery or whatever, you almost, you don't live presently. You're like living in fear of trying to manage it or trying to keep it or something.
CALLER 5
Right.
CALLER 2
And so you're saying with your. When you're in that state, you're in a state where you're actually being judged by the outside. So everything is a performance for the outside. So you have no direction anymore.
You have none of your own self directed thing. Nothing you're doing is for you. Do you kind of agree with that or you put it a different way?
HOST
Yeah, there's no footing there. You're doing it for the sake, you're doing it for the sake of winning, which I, I mean there, there's. To play devil's advocate. There is an argument to be had that you can absolutely sacrifice and burn your dignity and you can burn your morality and you can also burn your, your happiness to achieve extremely high results.
If you're, if your mission in life is just to impress other people. Yeah. I mean you can, you can, you can get rid of everything and you can catapult yourself as high as you want to go. But the, the biggest problem with that is that you, it's, it's never going to be good enough.
You're never ever going to find a threshold of success where it genuinely feels like you're satisfied. There's always that voice in the back of your mind that's kind of gnawing at you and that's a very, very, it's a very malevolent kind of force that you're dealing with there. It's extremely difficult to overcome that awareness because even if you're an idiot, I mean you're, that's still gonna goad you like, you're still gonna be kind of swarmed in that, in that kind of energy. And it's very difficult, it's very difficult to come to terms with the fact that you just spent your entire life taking yourself to the top of your game, but it still means nothing to you.
Yeah, and a lot of, and a lot of, a lot of athletes wrestle with this. A lot of, A lot of UFC fighters can be the best in the world. And that's why you see the destructive chip they have on their shoulder. A lot of these guys got there running off of pure self hatred and self loathing.
And then when they, when they actually achieve what they set out to do, they want to torch it all because deep down they think they're a piece of. And so you're, you're, they're gonna, they're gonna kind of realize and self actualize what's really going on beneath the surface. I mean, that's the whole game is self imaging. Because if you truly think you're a piece of, it truly doesn't matter how high you climb or how much you achieve, you're always going to find ways to, to reflect that truth back to yourself.
So you'll start, you'll, you'll just start alienating yourself, just start self sabotaging all your relationships. You'll start getting a drug habit. It's a, it's a very, very perverse way to live. But again, on the outside, and this is the whole thing too is, I mean, you have to understand that when you see most success, how good things look on the outside is very proportional to how up things are on the inside.
Like a lot of, a lot of sparkling success that you see. You cannot imagine the pathologies and dysfunctions that's going on internally with these people in order to get there. That's sort of the wicked, that's sort of the wicked aspect of success is that there's a lot of really, really, really up, devious kind of these, these spiteful self loathing behaviors that are driving these things.
CALLER 2
It's like you're trying to fill your self worth hole with outside accomplishments. Right? A lot of times those accomplishments are not even set by you. They're like societal level ones.
So you think if you get like the 50 million and the supercar and the hot models or whatever, then you've achieved the, the self worth goal or whatever, but you don't get anything from it.
HOST
You don't get anything from it. And what's even crazier than that is even the accolades and everybody giving you blandishments and compliments and telling you what a g you are, you're not even gonna feel that. That just. That just.
That just sloughs off your shoulders. But again, you're critiquing yourself as the performer. So where. Where these people derive their satisfaction is from critiquing that the performer is the one getting the accolades.
It's not even you at that point. You're just playing a character. And so the more accolades the character gets, you kind of get some. Some very perverse satisfaction from critiquing the fact that the character is the one that's absorbing all of this praise, but you yourself are completely dissociated from it.
These guys have zero ability to tap in and actually feel the pleasure of that. It's more of just how much can I feed this sort of alter ego? And so you're just sort of feeding this empty vessel, and you. Like you said you could.
That's a infinite gaping hole. You can never fill that. And you certainly can't fill it up with stuff. No.
No amount of stuff you stuff into that hole is gonna. Is gonna make that feel complete or whole.
CALLER 2
And because it wasn't you, you can't repeat it or you can't keep it, and you can't maintain it. And you live in fear the whole time.
HOST
Yeah, you're living in fear the whole time. Dude, I had a tweet about this, which I thought was on point. I said something to the effect of these pickup artist dudes don't realize that when you trick a chick into loving you, you will never be able to believe her when she does tell you she loves you. Like, you won't believe her, and then you'll resent her, and you'll start to hate her for not being smart enough to uncover the fact that she was tricked.
So that's the problem is a lot of these guys that are faking it, they actually start to resent the people that are close to them in their personal lives for not calling them out and not uncovering the lie. So they start to hate every. They start to hate everybody else because they want to be adjusted, and everybody wants to be put in their place. Right?
Everybody wants to fall back to the truth of their unconscious mind. And so if the world is not reinforcing that and you. And you feel like you're getting away with something or you feel like you're getting something over on somebody, you're gonna start to despise those people because. Because you're gonna be angry at them that the trick worked.
That's what's so, that's what's so insane about the whole thing is you're. Is like you can, you can win over a woman's love through deception. You can play this game your whole life. It's not, it's not hard to trick anybody like that.
People don't understand that. I mean, it's, it's easy. You can go your entire life tricking everyone. The problem is you're never gonna believe them when they show you affection or show you good grace or show you kindness.
You're not going to believe it. And so then you're just going to go back into these very, very strange, destructive personal habits and behaviors that are going to level that shit out.
CALLER 2
And it takes a lot of energy to do. Because you just said about. If you are like one of those pickup dudes and you're copying lines or you're doing certain tricks or whatever, that takes a lot of energy, a lot of cpu, doesn't it? Like you're going to keep doing that for months.
Like, you're never present, you're never doing what you're doing. Like, I think that stuff will unfold eventually and they'd see through it anyway. So even if you got what you wanted, like you, you're gonna revert right to your original state at the start.
HOST
Yeah, exactly. And, and the, the funny thing about that is, is that if these guys put a fraction, literally a fraction of the energy that it takes to maintain these, these contrived identities, they would actually have it for real. But they don't want it for real because they don't feel they deserve it. So do you see the pattern here?
It all circles back to that worthlessness and that feeling of. Of self hate. They don't want it for real. They want the contrived, confabulated reality because, because reinforces the shame.
Every time the chick tells him she loves him and he doesn't believe her, he gets to, he gets to act out and lash out in other ways in his life. And that's, that's, that's his permission, that's his permission to be destructive, to be a piece of. To trample on other people, to be a liar, to be a cheater. Is that shame?
Shame gives people permission to act out in all sorts of very bizarre ways.
CALLER 2
So it's kind of like whatever you're putting out there in the world, you're just. Whatever you say it's like you're putting out. I don't feel like I'M good enough. Can you tell me I'm good enough?
And then like, you're copying things to do, but you don't actually want to become the person that does those things. You just want to copy pieces of it to get the results.
HOST
Exactly. You're in a. You're in a glass box. You can't.
CALLER 3
You're.
HOST
You're inaccessible. You can't have. You can't have real relationships with anybody. It's impossible.
So that's why these. That's why these people piss it all away on purpose. So they. And also there's a.
There's a high off of this. These guys get a kick out of destroying everything in their life because then they get to reimagine and re engineer this brand new identity. They're like, oh, like that. That's the high.
The high is these guys destroy everything in their life and they're like, all right, now I get to be the next character. Now I get to try on all these new clothes, new adornments, new tricks, new one liners. And they get a high off of launching that brand new personality. Because the new personality that they're, that they're assuming, he.
That personality absorbs all the blows and all the damage. So the person, it's a defense mechanism. The person themselves never really feels the heat or the pain because they're constantly in a cycle of destroying these fake personalities. And when you destroy a fake personality, it just doesn't hurt that bad.
CALLER 2
Yeah, and it's kind of like a. I look at it as like a hiding thing because that behavior you're talking about, I used to do that a lot when I was younger where you. You play out a role in some community or whatever. And you know, you can just end it any moment.
You can just end that, start something new and go somewhere else. It's like. It's kind of. You're hiding the real you.
HOST
Exactly, brother. That's exactly what it is. Yeah, man, I appreciate that question, brother. We're gonna keep it moving.
Thank you. Yo, Kiam. What's going on, man? What's up?
CALLER 5
All right, so just wanted to hop in here real quick. So I weld tanker trailers for a living, right? And you know, I'm just thinking about everything you're saying because, you know, in my job, dude, you're building 80 mile an hour bombs, you know, there's no faking that. You know, like you cannot be a right.
You jump in and right from the jump, you know, you're assumed to be a dumbass until every Day you show up and you get better every day, right? And you know, you hop on Twitter, man, and like society nowadays and Internet and software geeks and all this, we build these identities around crafting, around crafting yourself however you want in public, online. And so my question to you, like, what do you think? What do you think are the steps you take to defeat this kind of propensity to sculpt our personality?
Especially people, you know, 30 and younger? You know, I work with a bunch of dudes, they're all twice my age, man. You know, because no one my age, no one my age is saying, yeah, I want to weld the tanker trailer, like, get me in there, because you're in the fire, dude, right away, you know, and if you're a, you will get cut out, you know what I'm saying? So I just wanted to, I, I think personally that's why you hop on Twitter.
You see a bunch of successful all saying the same thing. They say, you know, hit the gym, drink water every day because there's certain you can't fake, you know, you can't fake the barbell off of the platform, you know what I'm saying? And so you understand intrinsically that to get there, you have to make these tiny little adjustments to yourself, you know, and, and if you miss, you have to accept that failure and rebuild yourself. So my question to you is, what do you think are the actions we take to get away from this culture where we, we craft ourselves around these fake identities that no real actions have even, you know, produced?
HOST
I have a very radical approach to that. And, and nobody likes it when I say this because I'm right. Is that, is this idea that if you do not have an identity that you are pleased with or you feel that you're being inauthentic, there's only one move on the board, there's only one move on the chessboard, and that is this. You have to literally destroy every relationship in your life.
When I say destroy, I don't mean in a self destructive way. I mean you need to literally turn your back on everything in your life and go into the street and literally become a survivor. Like a lot of these guys literally need to actually learn how to fend for themselves in the street. Figure out where you're gonna get housing.
They need to reset the entire fucking game board, hardcore. So that what they really think and what they really believe about life will bubble up from the surface. I'm talking no safety nets, no parents, no bailouts, no friends that are going to let you sleep on your couch. It's your world now.
You got to fucking go to a bar, you got to literally start fucking meeting strangers and figure out how the fuck what your next move is. I did it. I did it when I was 17. It was the greatest fucking journey I ever did.
I went into the fucking streets. I had nothing. No car, no money, nothing. And I figured it the out.
Why? Because I had to. You're. You're never gonna die, people.
The first thing people worry about is how am I, where am I gonna sleep, how am I gonna eat? Trust me, you will find a way to eat and sleep. That's the least of your troubles. That's the least of your worries, is how you're gonna survive.
You will survive if you have to. It's that you're gonna have to become an entirely different person in the process. That's where the fear is. People are afraid to.
To make changes. It's that simple.
CALLER 5
Thank you. Bang on, man. Thanks for letting me talk.
HOST
Yep. And that's what I would do, by the way. If, if, if like, if A approaches me, especially in my DMs, on Twitter and they tell me, look, I don't know what to do with my life. I'm melancholy.
I have no clue how to make money. First thing I'm gonna tell them, even though they're not gonna like it, is you need to move out of your parents house right now, now, not tomorrow. And you need to completely start fending off and staving off the wolves completely by yourself, alone. Because that's a rite of passage.
That is a rite of passage. Every great man leaves their family for a long period of time, builds his identity, constructs and fashions some form of hyper success, and then reintegrates himself back into the community after he's been a lone wolf. The lone wolf archetype is an essential step of becoming a man that everybody misses. Because all the benefits come from that.
And then again, the logical conclusion from being a lone wolf and finding success is then you reintegrate yourself in the community. And that's when people really start respecting you and asking for your opinion and caring about what the you have to say. Because you proved that you could do the on your own, but nobody wants to go at it alone. Everyone wants cushions, parents, people cheering them on.
All of that shit is fucking nonsense and breeds weakness and it breeds you cashing in sympathy and becoming a fucking victim. I don't believe in any of that. I've seen it in my own life. Nothing Was extraordinary about me when I was 17.
Truly, like, I had to completely craft myself from scratch when I was 17 and I had to rebuild from nothing. And guess what? As soon as I started saying whatever the I wanted to say, I behaving, however the I wanted to behave, everything made sense, and nothing in life made sense prior to. Prior to that moment.
It was only when I dropped the floor out from underneath me and could really start being me that everything came into perspective. Prior to that, my life was just massive confusion. Constantly being frustrated and flustered why things weren't working out. So that's what you guys need to do.
You guys need a radical approach to change. I'm gonna take the next question. Moss.
CALLER 5
Hey, Bruce.
HOST
I wanted to ask this a couple spaces ago, but wasn't able to get on. So I apologize if this is a hair off topic, but you started tweeting a little more about, you know, raising your son and imparting some lessons. The two that mainly stuck out to me were. One was like, kids don't understand consequentialism.
Like, to put that down or you'll go into timeout versus put that down
CALLER 2
because I said so.
HOST
And then the stuff about Santa Claus and fairy tales and like that. I'm curious on when you plan on
CALLER 2
sort of continuing to impart some of
HOST
these lessons and through what medium? Or are you planning on just kind of letting it happen organically? No, dude, I. I do everything kind of instinctually.
That's the funny thing is, like, I'm glad you asked that, because a lot of people have asked me. They're like, so when you become a father, are these, like, do these massive psychological shifts happen? Does it feel any different? Doesn't feel any different.
It doesn't feel any different. I mean, I was ready for whatever was going to come, but it's. There's. There's absolutely nothing in my life has changed.
It's. It's extremely an intuitive process. I don't ever feel like I have to consult the consortium of wisdom of other fathers. Like, everything just feels extremely natural.
And I kind of use those guiding forces to kind of just make on the fly decisions. I mean, I. I go off of intuition. I know when I was a kid, I lost a lot of respect for my folks when they would tell me white lies.
And so I. That's just an alley that I'm unwilling to go down. I think that. I think it's just extremely important to treat your kids like adults, truly, and give them that sort of same respect.
I mean, obviously, you have to have a guiding hand. And sometimes there's, there's, there's moments required kind of ruling with that iron fist, that's for sure. But I think that whole culture around white lies is, is extremely idiotic because kids are geniuses. They're absolute geniuses and they honor and respect truth above all else.
So that's just where I operate from. Right on, man.
CALLER 3
Thank you.
HOST
We got this guy, B. What's up, man?
CALLER 4
Oh, oh yeah, like a bunch of point raising, Raising your son. My uncle has two sons. So basically with the first son he essentially up. Because he's basically a rich.
He's a rich uncle and gave his first son everything essentially. And then with the second son, he basically treated him as an adult essentially. And he basically. Yeah, he made him earn everything he has.
And the problem with the first son is it goes back to your first point about essentially how you fake it until you make it essentially. And if you don't, if you didn't earn it, you, you're gonna find a way to go back to baseline. He's basically my cousin and essentially is. He's a drug addict, essentially.
And how would I put it? He has everything essentially. That's, that's the thing that always confused me. He basically has everything.
But the thing is, it's for me, it's from my uncle, his father and essentially is becoming a second version of. He's becoming a low degraded version of his father. But then how would I put it? I'm trying to say how, how would I put it?
I want to say that he's becoming. Yeah. A lower quality version of his father essentially, but then inverted, if you know what I mean. Like opposite.
HOST
Yeah, exactly. So, so the kid. So, so this is an interesting topic. I believe that the child himself, not the child when he's a grown man dictates.
He dictates what he's going to receive from his parents. And what I mean by this is that every situation has to be treated individually. Sometimes you have the type of kid who, who wants to fucking carve and hack and slash his own path and doesn't want to be groomed for the family business, doesn't want to be a part of the generational cycle of wealth. I respect the.
Out of that. Anybody who has the balls to say this, I'm not going to go work for my family. I'm going to live my true destiny. That's an extremely respectable honorable path.
That guy will intentionally alienate himself from receiving the bounties of his parents work. He'll do it intentionally, meaning he will make it clear through his behavior that he's not looking for handouts. So that guy's not going to get handouts. Then there's some kids who engineer their entire life around grooming the family business, which is also a fair path, if that's what you truly want.
But he's also going to dictate receiving some sort of large inheritance, etc. Etc. Personally, I never wanted inheritance. I never wanted handouts.
I never wanted it. So I intentionally created my entire worldview. My entire life was designed around avoiding that happening. And I created the perfect conditions to where that was not possible because I wanted to forge myself.
I wanted to christen myself in the fire. A lot of guys want to do that. And that's a very. That's, like I said, it's a very honorable path.
So the kid is always going to dictate what he's receiving from the parents. Some kids just know how to manipulate and they know how to fucking, you know, use the parlor etiquette and play the party line to get what they want. And that's fine. But like you said, a lot of those kids who get bequeathed all of those benefits, those large inheritances, the self image, the money matured faster than they did and they.
They fall back to sort of that drug addict, sort of very, you know, very up loser sort of mentality. So it's just, it all depends on who the person is. Like that whole. That whole meme about not giving your kids anything because it's because you want to give them the struggle.
You're not going to leave your kids anything. I don't think that's a one size fits all process. I think it absolutely just depends on who you're dealing with. Some kids, if you give them the codes to the.
If you give them the codes to the nuclear room, they're gonna blow up the world. So it just, it just depends on who can handle the responsibility and who can't. And that has to be. That has to be assessed individually.
Adam, what's up? Adam, you got a second to talk, bro? All right, moving on.
CALLER 3
Mr. Da yeah, I appreciate you letting me.
HOST
Come on.
CALLER 3
I saw one of your tweets that was talking about, you know, the difference between self talk and kind of listening to yourself. So I'm kind of going through an issue right now where sometimes I feel like I'm forcing myself to want more than I actually want. So it's like I do have a certain level of ambition that I've had since I'm Young, but as I'm starting to actually achieve things and get, you know, wins, I'm starting to feel a bit, you know, overwhelmed and exhausted sometimes to where, you know, maybe I'm defaulting back to this, you know, self talk where I'm saying to myself, do you know what? I want a more simpler life.
Maybe I don't really want all these things, you know, this extravagant lifestyle that I see. You know, a lot of this side of Twitter, you know, a lot of the people that tend to follow you and interact with your content, they tend to promote a certain lifestyle. And sometimes I feel like I'm forcing myself to want that. So, you know, my question is really, where do you draw the line between self talk and listening to yourself?
And in terms of the whole one in more out of life and then one in a simpler life, how do you go. Go about balancing that? What would you say to your son about that?
HOST
Yeah, man, I never listen to myself about anything. I. I have a very fucking. I have an extremely powerful inner voice that I use to intervene, and I.
I conduct intervention on just about every single thing that I'm going through. I am constantly bombarding myself and talking myself through situations, uplifting myself. That interior voice is literally the whole game, bro. Like, it's, it's.
And here's the thing about what you said, it's so interesting is every successful killer that you know is constantly coaching themselves and working themselves through issues and talking down their nerves and constantly in a. In a state of just talking, building. You're just, you're. I never listen because.
Because I've been fooled and I've been bamboozled by my. By myself way too many times when I'm listening to the voices in my head. So I override that shit. And that's why I've always said thinking.
The benefit of thinking is largely in knowing what thoughts not to think. It's not really in the thoughts that you're thinking. It's in knowing what kind of thoughts to block out. That's.
That's sort of the more powerful function of thinking, is actually just using your thinking to block out the momentum killers.
CALLER 6
And.
HOST
And here's the thing, dude, is like, things will be going very swimmingly for a guy. He'll have a ton of momentum because he's in flow. Everything's clicking, and then he panics because he doesn't want that moment to stop. He doesn't want that momentum to end.
But he doesn't realize that because he just flinched and because he just panicked and because he's trying to recapture the magic that he's been experiencing for the last couple weeks or months or years. It's already over. He already destroyed the flow. It's done.
And so it's interesting because it was working. Everything was working for you because you weren't self analyzing. That's why it was working. And then people want that process to continue by self analyzing.
So you're doing the, you're doing the very thing that didn't work for you in the first place, and you're using that to try to continue the momentum. And it's funny because as soon as you start microanalyzing and self analyzing again, you're fucked. You're fucked. All that momentum is destroyed and now you got to start over again and get back into that flow state.
So I try to be very cautious about not interrupting those states and not trying to figure out what's going right. Like, why is this going so fucking well? How can I reverse engineer this so I can make this go on to infinity? That is a, that is, that is the sword of Damocles because you're, it's the Gordian knot.
Like there's, there's no chance that you're going to continue the run that you're on when you get into that, that state of being. So, dude, I mean, that flow state also is, is tremendously fueled by that selft talk. And again, the self talk doesn't have to be positive. It's.
It can be very negative. I mean, you can, you can absolutely be lashing yourself. You can be cracking whips, you can be absolutely abusing yourself mentally to, to achieve great things. It doesn't always have to be rose tinted.
It's just. Who's the author? That's the question you have to ask yourself. Who the.
Who's the author? I mean, you. Because you can override all of these processes and that's like, that's like 99% of the success, dude, is overriding the things that you don't feel like doing and overriding the things that are trying to bring you down. Override that.
You have to summon that, that, that dictator voice in your head to barrel through those issues. Those issues. And I'm doing that all day. I'm very aware of it.
I am just in a continuous state of self talk and I don't listen.
CALLER 3
Yeah, you literally described my situation to the T is like I took a couple wins, things were going good, and then I decided to just slow down and assess. Okay, so this is what's happened. What do I do now? And then in that moment, things have just been quiet.
And in that quietness, I've started to listen to myself more. And I just keep defaulting to, you know what? You don't really want a certain lifestyle. This is all just the people that you're surrounding yourself by.
What's wrong with having a simple life? What's wrong with just being, you know, calm and normal? So I think that's kind of what's happening where I slowed down, I killed the momentum, and, you know, I started to listen to my voice. So I appreciate what you said.
I think I'm just gonna have to override this. I'm gonna have to start again and kind of push myself to override that voice that's trying to get me to kind of settle for a more simpler life, which is the issue that I've been having. But I appreciate it a lot.
HOST
Yeah, brother. And just try to enjoy that momentum, man. Try not to panic and just be cautious of the way that you're. That you're starting to freak out because you don't want it to end, bro.
I mean, that's. That's the momentum killer. So you gotta just stay in that groove and enjoy those moments and not worry about why things are working the way they are. You just gotta roll.
You just gotta roll with it.
CALLER 3
Yeah. Appreciate it.
HOST
Yep.
CALLER 6
I've noticed, man. I've done that plenty of times when it have came to women, man. I would just be on the road when it comes to getting bad, bad after bad, and then I just like it, man. I'm just gonna stop.
HOST
I don't.
CALLER 6
I don't even want to deal with the momentum of keep having to continue to do it. So I just stop all together.
HOST
Yeah. People, dude, people freak out and get. And get terrified when things are working so well. They're like.
They're like, God, why the are things working so well? I gotta. I gotta add some drama and some into this situation. So things aren't going so well.
People have a really hard time rolling when things are just going so smooth. It's almost like people just subconsciously constantly need some sort of drama or problem so they can feel like a hero. Because now they got to step in and solve a problem that really wasn't even there. But you created the problem on purpose because now you want to feel like you're some, you know, cowboy for overcoming it.
But if you just left all those problems aside, I mean, the sky was the limit, but people don't want to breach that. They don't want to breach past that comfort zone. Very up.
CALLER 4
Would you say it's a way of getting back to baseline as you normally see?
HOST
What's that?
CALLER 4
Would you say it's a way of people going back to baseline? Like the self image is reverting back to what it sees itself as?
HOST
It's that. But people also don't want the expectations that come along with success because. Because to maintain all that success is a position that a lot of people actually truly don't want to be in. Everybody says they want to be an entrepreneur and they want to be a smashing success and they want to be extremely successful.
But if you put them in the shoes of somebody who is that they cry uncle within five minutes and want their old life back because they don't want the pressure and responsibility. So that's why people fuck things up because the expectations remain very low.
CALLER 4
Now that you mention it, actually I've seen that with like my uncle, like the one I'm talking about who's rich, like the, the first son who's basically a up. He's the one who wanted to run the business and then my uncle let him run it and then he. Everything up and then he had to come back, Michael had to come back and fix things. Essentially.
HOST
Of course, I mean, dude, the up role is extremely powerful. A lot of people when they, in absence of talent or any, any kind of discernible skills they have, they will kind of fall into this default mode of just being a perpetual up. Because being a up creates a lot of attention. And a lot of people get a lot of attention.
They get a lot of handouts, they get a lot of love, they get a lot of sympathy, they get a lot of grace just by being a perpetual up. It's, it's a very, very up argument archetype. But a lot of guys have just sort of figured out that if they just constantly are a up or they're a klutz or they're constantly, you know, things up, eventually everyone's just going to lower the bar so low for them that they really don't need very much to survive. It's a way of doing the bare minimum work to survive is what it is.
They figured out that if they can just constantly be in this cycle of just being, you know, being seen as a screw up, that, that see somehow eventually everyone's just going to lower the bar and, and continue to give them the benefits of somebody else who's putting in the work. The problem with that again is the self image question. It takes you back to that shame and self hate and rage and all those horrific emotions. So.
Let's keep this running. We got dan.
CALLER 1
Hey, man.
HOST
Wow.
CALLER 1
There was a lot of topics that has been addressed so far. So I'll try to. Try to make a line connect all of this. So you mentioned rites of passage.
We also had pathology, let's call it pathology of the path to success, character and purpose. Well, Hannah, fake it till you make it. So in the beginning I had a question about this pathology and this, this neurosis that seems to be part of the process of success. Is it really like part of the process?
Are they like unavoidable consequences? Like if you want the success, if you want the good thing, you have to go through all this psychological battlefields or is just a sign that it's all wrong? You know what I mean? Is there a way to be successful?
Is there a way to overcome yourself without all of these new roses and obsessions and pathologies? I mean like a healthy weight to get there or is just part of it?
HOST
No, dude, I think you have to have. I think you have to be under genuine. You have to be under genuine threat. And, and that's, that's kind of like my whole philosophy kind of, kind of circles around that is that, is that a man has to be under genuine threat, meaning there has to be a true proof of stake or a true genuine threat of loss.
That's why these guys who are playing the game with daddy's money or whatever, they don't really learn the game and they also don't really learn about life because there's no real threat there. But when you're playing on your own devices and your own terms and you only have yourself to take care of, the game really only starts to make sense to you when you start putting things under threat. And I'm talking everything, not just your resources, I'm talking about your, your, your mentality, your heart. When you go after a woman that you like and you get your heart broken, all of that is putting yourself under threat.
And that's where superhumans are created. Superhumans are created under those conditions because if you prove to yourself time and time again that you can overcome that and you come out the other side and continually, not only are you surviving, but you continually find new thresholds of strength. It becomes an extremely addicting process that all of self help is in self destruction. It's not in self help because you have to break things apart.
You have to break things apart to understand them. You have to break Yourself, you have to break your mind. That's why in the military they strip guys down before they build them back up. Because fundamentally everybody knows that a man has to be stripped down to nothing before he can be rebuilt into the man he wants to be.
So there has to be genuine threat. That's why guys don't like my advice of going out into the street and leaving your parents house and being homeless and figuring it out. Because, because night one, you're not going to be sleeping in a park. You have no choice.
You're going to literally have to go meet a fucking stranger. Yeah, it's going to be a wild adventure. It's going to be extremely fucking bizarre. But you have no choice.
And it's funny because when you leave men no choice, they're the most free that they will ever be. Men are the most free when their choices are extremely narrowed. But when you give them a panoply of choices, they completely self destruct and malfunction. But if you're, if your only choice today is going to find housing or find food so you can survive, that's a.
Your life becomes very simple. And that's where, that's where that. No, but that's where that character development comes in that you're talking about because you're, because guess what? When you're under true threat now you have to do things that you wouldn't think you would do before.
Now you have to really push the envelope of creativity and you have to, you have to summon strength in yourself that you didn't even know existed. That's where all the fucking great stories come from. The genesis of all of these stories are men who were under horrific pressure. Atlas was just absolutely prying them down on their shoulders and they were able to find a way to respond and fight back and summon forces that didn't know they had.
I mean that's. My life is a product of that as well. I've been in so many survival scenarios where I found ingenious ways to get myself back into a five star hotel very quickly because I personally despise living in conditions. So putting that pressure on myself allowed me to become an entirely different person.
The right kind of person for the situation at hand.
CALLER 1
So would you say that all these conditions are, are part of this rite of passage? So not the outer conditions?
HOST
Dude, Absolutely. And society is so gay that it's not going to offer you these rites of passage anymore. That's the problem with living in a sanitized society is we. When you live in a metropolitan city or you live in these, in these sanitized places, all of those rites of passage are excoriated.
So you have to create them yourself. You have to simulate going to hell on your own. In order to find these mental focal points of strength. You have to put yourself in situations that are jarringly uncomfortable and where you're actually wrestling with real fear and real threats.
Because then when you come out of that, you're just differentiated from the package. Mean, that's, that's what individuality is, right? It's, that's how you really differentiate yourself as a man and make yourself unequal is by putting yourself in unequal circumstances. If everybody's in, living in air conditioned apartments in the city and people, no one's doing hard things.
You're going to get a bunch of. But if you get the one guy who's going to go out and be like, hm, you know what? It's 120 degrees outside today. Everybody's indoors in the shade because they're scared of the heat.
Guess what? I'm going to go run sprints in the dead heat because it's brutal and it sucks. That guy is gonna start to carve out some mental spaces that are going to start separating him from everybody else. But nobody wants to do the hard things.
And I always say training is where you want it to be. Brutal as possible. I personally despise air conditioning gyms. I don't, I don't need fancy towel service.
Give me a dungeon, give me some twisted metal and let me just get to work. Because I prefer to, I prefer to train in very challenging conditions because then when you have to actually perform, it's easy. It's easy. I'm training in brutal conditions.
I'm miserable when I'm training. I'm sweating out of every pore. It blows. But then when I actually have to perform in any setting, even outside the gym, I have that mental wherewithal.
So it's just about fucking pushing these energy end ranges, man. The human mind is incredible. What you can subject it to and what you can overcome. But you have to have a.
Yeah,
CALLER 1
I have a question to that. Sorry to interrupt. So the question is, when does that stop, actually? Because let me just quickly tell you something.
Just last year I, I kind of had to force my self initiation and I spent a winter in the Swedish woods and suffered cold and malnutrition and all that stuff. And I had to impose that on myself. And I did it over and over again for like three or four years until I had to learn it and pass through it finally. So my friends and people who loved me, my mother and ex girlfriends and they all asking me all the time, why are you constantly challenging yourself and imposing these condition upon yourself if they are not necessary?
And I didn't have an answer for them. And so the question is, when do you actually stop? You as a man, do you have to constantly do that and challenge yourself? Because you thrive in these conditions, constantly initiating yourself?
HOST
Of course, dude, it never stops. That's the whole fucking game. That's why these people who strike it rich can't maintain it. Because guess what?
Even if I'm a billionaire tomorrow, I still have to go run in 120 degree heat. There's no privilege, there's no amount of money, there's no amount of status that puts you beneath getting your elbows dirty and going into the mud. That's the beauty of it. That's the beauty of being rich, is you still do all those difficult things.
People are like, this guy's a billionaire. Why the fuck does he have to go run hill sprints in 120 degree heat? It's like I still have to condition my mind. You will get soft so fucking fast as a man if you take your foot off, off the gas.
That's why these guys piss it all away because they have no genuine challenges. So you have to manufacture those challenges. It's like the whole thing about becoming rich so that you can outsource your work to other people. I disagree with that.
If I'm a billionaire, I'm not letting a at a hotel carry my bags. Why the can I snatch £300 and I'm in the best shape of my life so someone else can carry my bags. I'll carry my own bags, thank you. So it's like no matter what kind of status I come into, I'm the same fucking guy.
I'm still carrying my own bags. I'm still doing all that rough and gritty work I was doing when I was poor. Nothing fucking changes. Yeah, I'll probably have a fucking maid and a cleaning crew and fudgeing.
I'll outsource all the laundry and all those bullshit menial tasks. But when it comes to the shit that actually fucking matters, like taking responsibility for your life, driving your own cars, all that shit, dude, I don't want fucking, I don't want a driver that's the gayest on earth. That's that, that's what I'm talking about, about men becoming soft. They get rich.
Now you got a driver who just Drives you around town. What happened to wanting to remain in control of your destiny? Wanting to being. Being obsessively concerned with being in control of your destiny is why you got rich in the first place and you forgot where you came from.
So for me, money is just an amplifier to do things I'm already doing. I'm always going to be doing the rough and greedy work. I'm always going to be going back into the mud and to challenge my mind and figure out. And that's.
That's how you preserve and maintain your integrity, and that's how you maintain and preserve your wealth.
CALLER 1
All right, so there's literally no, no stop to it. You just have to.
HOST
The work never ends. Over and over again, the work never ends. And that brings me great peace. Knowing that there's.
There's never a vantage point, there's never a place you can arrive to. There's no destination nation on this earth where you have to stop working. It doesn't exist. It's not possible.
And that's. That's the beauty of life. Knowing that every day makes it so easy to put one step in front of the other and just do the next right thing. Because I know it never stops.
Just like, you know, you have to feed yourself every day. That doesn't stress you out? Doesn't stress you out that, you know, you have to put food in yourself, food in your mouth tomorrow? Well, it doesn't stress me out knowing tomorrow I gotta face a new challenge, a new hurdle, put myself in a new situation where I can see things differently.
None of that shit stresses me out because I realize it's part of the fucking game. All right, man.
CALLER 1
Thanks. That was. That was quite motivating. Thank you,
HOST
Daniel.
CALLER 7
Hey, I. I really love this. I love this emphasis where you say that when a man is in a position with no choice and there's true threat, it forces him to rely on his instincts. And I see this big theme in a lot of what you talk about where nowadays people are trained to look for answers outside of themselves, and so they don't develop a relationship with their instincts.
But there's this other side to this which I'd really love to hear you riff on. In my life, most of my growth has come from my gang, like my close masculine relationships, the right people being in my life and challenging me. And so I'm curious how you think about that, because on one end, you need independence, so you cultivate your instincts. On another end, life is so much better when I have, like, a team of people who are pushing me to.
To do better. So what's your experience with that?
HOST
Yeah, you know, I. It's. It's funny. I.
I don't have. I really don't have that in my life. And it's by choice because I really don't. I don't particularly care for it.
And I've tried to understand why, and I think it's because I'm a. I'm a delegator. So what I do all day in my business, in the sports betting industry is I delegate. I'm telling people what to do all day.
And that's a very. It is a very reciprocal relationship because I'm constantly in a leadership position. And so the feedback that I get from my crew, like, I am a guy who's willing to lead from the front, and I think that's where I kind of derive that satisfaction is I'm willing to destroy myself for my people and kind of kind of working with that same ethic you just said. I mean, I will never ask another man to do something that I am not willing to do to do myself.
That's a principle I've lived by for. For the longest time. If I. If someone else is deploying capital in my sports game, you can bet your ass I'm deploying five or ten times more than they are.
I will never, ever have someone do something that I am unwilling to do myself in another man. And I think that sort of does create these ecosystems of relationships where everybody just kind of respects. Here's the thing, dude. I think.
I think what you're talking about is, like, a lot of guys learn how to just kind of respect everybody in their own ecosystem. Like, I find a very little need to intrude upon what other people are doing. Does that make sense? Like, people don't really intrude on me.
I don't really intrude on them. I'm kind of. All the guys that I work with are adept enough and smart enough to kind of know how to play their role. Role.
I don't really feel like there has to be any kind of, like, intervention with that or checks and balances. I think that's the highest state to be in, personally.
CALLER 5
Yeah.
CALLER 7
So I have a suspicion that. That you might be an outlier. You know, I think there are some people that. They really thrive with that, like pure independence, like the lone wolf archetype.
But I think the majority of people, it's so much more efficient if they surround themselves with high performers and then have, like, trusting relationships with them. And I'll give you one quick personal example. It was recently my birthday and I asked my close friends to make a list of my blind spots and give it to me as like a birthday gift. So it was like a self induced intervention and it was one of the most efficient things I've done for my personal growth in my entire life.
Like in one day I just grew like so profoundly because it's very hard for an individual to discern their own blind spots. I do think there are people that on net it's better for them to be like fiercely independent. I've just learned I'm not one of those people.
HOST
Yeah, that's interesting, man. That's, that's actually a dope exercise. I appreciate you sharing that.
CALLER 7
Yeah, cool, thanks. I appreciate you.
HOST
Yeah, brother.
CALLER 8
Yo, what's up Brute? I just had a quick question going back to your previous person you were talking to. So when you were saying that you want to create as much hardship and suffering in your, in your life. And I completely agree with that and I was just wondering where do you draw the line between these people who are just doing it for sort of like egoic masturbation?
You know, like the cold showers, the, the, you know what I'm saying?
HOST
Yeah. So it's all, it's, it's all risk dependent. Right. So no fap.
Cold showers, zero risk. That's why, that's why I don't like it. There's no, there's no real stake in the game there. If you fail, what's.
What are the consequences? Nothing. I'm, I, I am all about raising the antity, raising the Annie and raising the stakes. The consequences.
There has to be dire consequences for the risks that you're taking. And so any self development that is low stake, low risk, I don't want any part of. Right. Because I realized that's that what they're doing is a life hack which was kind of circles back to my original point.
Right. Like life hacks. That's why life hacks are so gay. Because you can't trick your unconscious mind.
Your unconscious mind still knows you're not doing the work. It's like I had that tweet which is so on point about fasting. 95% of the benefits of fasting for the ancestral man was in the fact that he genuinely was hungry because he had no food. These are fasting when they have 80 ribeyes in the, in the refrigerator. So the mental component is, is not truly there.
You can't trick your mind. Your, but your mind, your organism is not really under that EU stress, that good stress of knowing that you're fasting, it's all sort of mimicry. And I just, I don't, I don't agree with those modalities at all.
CALLER 8
Right. So in order, I guess, like for like true growth to happen from these hardships, there needs to be like no like vehicles of retreat.
HOST
Almost exactly. It's a burn. It's a burn. The boats mentality, like scorched earth, like death ground.
I have to fight my way out of this or there actually is going to be a consequence that I, that I, that I do not want to live with. And if you, and if you can take on enough of those challenges, I mean, dude, there's literally no competition because nobody's doing this. Nobody wants to do this. Everyone wants to do the life hacks, the growth tips, business tips.
Everyone wants all the tricks and all the gimmicks. But if you can go without that and you can brave this world without needing any of that shit. Dude, I mean you just, you, you stand out like a sore thumb even in your aura when you walk into a room. I mean, people know.
People know within seconds who's doing the real gig and who's not. It's just fucking obvious, right?
CALLER 8
And then I just have one more question. So like, I think like a lot of your followers would benefit from a similar question. But so I just like graduated college and then I'm just like moving out next month just because like similarly like I need to create like a space where like things aren't easy. Like I'm not like at my parents house, you know, like I'm an unfamiliar area.
But like, so like how do I create as much of that type of hardship in order to grow and like truly like figure out my capabilities and like create like the individual. I want to like, you know, like burn down the man to create like who I want to be.
HOST
Yeah. In the modern world, the gauntlet is all financial pressure, right? Because we don't have any real, like real wars. Like all that shit's gone.
So in the modern realm, it's all in the financial space. Like the kind of financial pressure, the kind of financial risks that, that you should be taking, especially at your age are extreme. I mean you should be extremely extreme because you have all the energy in the world to bounce back. You're going to build resiliency.
I mean, who gives a if you lose your net worth when you're your age? Like you should absolutely start painting the town and being a machine gun artist with whatever resources you can acquire and see what sticks. And you're going to put yourself under that threat of having to fight back. If you, especially if you lose.
I mean, that's where, that's where all the magic really is. Because it takes so many losses to create that all together, man, and, and improving to yourself that you can survive. That, dude, is, is invaluable. These billionaires would trade in all the money in the world to have those experiences.
CALLER 8
That makes, no, that makes so much sense because I mean like, it's only in the unfamiliar territories when you're gonna grow. Because like if you're just constantly in familiar territory, then like your body just like knows the expectations.
HOST
Yeah, dude, your body knows everything. Like you can't trick your brain. So that's why actually putting yourself under threat is where all the magic happens. Dude, it's that shit's undefeated.
As far as, as far as turning yourself into a different person and interesting persons, people that, that someone who people are willing to listen to. I mean, you gotta go through thousands of those events and come out the other side because it's going to alter your perspective. The way you see things is never going to be the same. And the way you articulate yourself, the way you mole out your thought thoughts is going to change.
Like literally the whole way you see the world completely changes. And dude, I mean, what's better than that is constantly having your perspectives rotating.
CALLER 8
No, yeah, I 100 agree. Thanks a lot for having me ask or being able to let me talk.
HOST
Yeah, you got it, man. Thank you.